Gonzo

great idea!

SUPER PHOTOS! ! ! ! The water looks soooooo clear. I'm jealous! ! ! Looks like ya had a great time. Way to go buddy! Gonzo

I couldn't have said it better Joe. In some little way I think I'm making our jobs a little easier to deal with. Maybe even help the industry as a whole to see what it's really like out there and not just what people (general public included) assume it's like. Reality... the real deal. I think every person in the auto industry could learn a thing or two from reading my stories. laugh a little, confront the challenges... and take it one day at a time. Or at least that's my SWAG of it all. LOL

:) It's fun to make fun of people... but I'm trying to do it in a light hearted way. No offense to the customers... the comments and suggestion they some times have are all part of doing business. The best part is I get to share these with everyone... now that's fun :) I've got more... always do. Thanx for the comments... (Something tells me this one may never make it off the editors desk... LOL)

Wacky Customer Responses The things people will say.... Did ya ever notice some people just have an excuse for just about anything? Did ya ever notice how some people can have a quirky explanation of the problems with their cars? I sometimes wonder what some of these folks would think if they actually could understand it from my side of the counter. I've heard it all… nothing surprises me anymore. (Or at least I think I have.) So, I thought I would jot down some of the wacky problem descriptions and customer requests I've heard over the years. For those who work on my side of the repair counter… see how many of these you've heard before. Here's a few of my all time favorites: "I've got a shortage in my car." (What are you short of?) "I drive my car a lot, and it does this every day; last time was a month ago." "My car, it's going to blow up… I heard it ticking." "Every time I shut my car off, it won't start." "My valve stems won't stay aligned." "The tail lights went out on my car." I answer, "When did you notice they were out?" They'll answer, "At night." "My brother used to be a mechanic, so he knows everything." "It's not intermittent; I know it does it sometimes." "I don't want this car to last forever, I just want this one to last long enough until I can afford one that will." "I only drove the car a few miles since I left your place, so it's still under warranty." (Funny, we always record the odometer when a car comes in the shop… hmmm, seems like this mile is about… 5000 + miles long…) "I can't afford the repair, so just fix what's broke." 2 weeks after a customer has called, they arrive at the shop and tell you… "I'm the guy who called yesterday." "I'm not in a hurry for it." (A sign they'll be calling in less than a half hour to check on it.) "I have a relay switch going bad." (So which is it, a relay or a switch? Can a relay switch be going good?) "I need to pick it up today." (Closing time comes along, and they are nowhere to be found.) "I lost my voltage in the car." (Well… go find it…!) On Wednesday they drop the car off and tell me, "It only acts up on a Tuesday." "Is it cheaper if I help?" A lady drove up to the door, came into the office and said, "I can't have you fix my car right now, I'll have to come back… I'm waiting on a call from the aliens." (There's no way I could make this stuff up! I had never met this lady before, and she never came back. I guess the aliens got her!) "I don't care what it costs, just fix it." (Sure ya do…) "My car is having issues." "I'll have to wait on it, even if it takes you all night to fix it." "Here's a 10 spot, put my car ahead of that other guy's." (But the last guy gave me a 20… now what? Start a bidding war??) "All you mechanics are alike!" (Hmm, so you've met the twins?) "I should have learned to fix cars, so I could tell you what's wrong with it." "I was told at the last shop that I have a controller bearing out of sync." (When you sync the bearing… what does it control?) "You'll have to work around my dog, he stays in the car." "I already know what's wrong with it; I don't need you to tell me what's wrong." I ask, "So what's wrong with it?" Their answer… "I don't know…" "I sued the last mechanic who worked on my car." "Call me when you're not busy. I'll bring it then, so you can get right to my car." (I wouldn't be sitting by the phone waiting for that call…) "My car goes, chug, chug, chug, pippity pop, pop… and that's just to get the driver's door open. You should hear it when I start the car." (More door noise or the engine???) "You don't expect me to pay for that? Do you?" "I could have fixed that myself, if I knew what was wrong with it." "I want to speak to the mechanic who worked on the car. Oh you did? Then I want to speak to your boss, oh, you're the boss, well then I want to speak to the owner. Oh, you're the owner, then I want to speak to someone in charge." "I saw smoke coming out of my vents, so I poured water down them. Now when I turn on the blower motor it gurgles in the car. Did I do that?" "What kind of guarantee can you give me that I won't be back?" (And here I was thinking I wanted repeat customers… this one I just don't know about…) "Are you busy now? No… I'll be right over."… 3 days later… "I'm here" "Here's the keys. It's the blue one sitting out front." (There is only one car out front… and it's blue…) "So everything is working now, and I'm not going to have any problems with my car ever again… right?" (Dangerous question to answer yes to) If this doesn't fix it, can you recommend a better repair shop?" Ah yes, never a dull moment at the repair shop, that's for sure. Oh, there's more wacky comments I could add… but I think I'd run out of room to write them down. I'd like to think each and every one of us at some point in time said something stupid to a service person… I know I have, and I'm sure with my wacky sense of humor they'd be talking about it for a long, long time. You know, ya just gotta laugh at the comments after awhile. You can't take it seriously, or you'll just drive yourself crazy. Next time you get somebody at the counter and they want you to take a guess at a repair rather than actually diagnose it… tell em' what I tell them. "Sure, I'll take a SWAG at it." and when they ask, "What's a SWAG?" You can tell them. "Scientific Wild Ass Guess" … Best diagnostic short cut I've found to lighten the tension in the front office. Hey, they ain't the only ones who can use some wacky terminology… I can too. View full article

awesome video... makes ya think about those who served. great stuff

Good point Joe, and I'll add... it's not only in the shop.. but at home. The same thing can happen there, and if it happens at home... sometimes "I'm Sorry" won't cut it. Usually means a night on the coach, dinner out the next night, and a whole lot of "yes, dear, yes, dear" Too bad I can't offer a dinner or a coach for ya... mines taken. LOL Gonzo

Been there, don't that.. totally agree with ya Joe... If the customer would just sit down and wait, or wait for my call... I'll bet I could take care of it. I hate being pushed and shoved into a repair because THEY are on a time crunch. I've even had them tell me, "Call, me when your slower, I'll bring the car back then so you can get to it right away." Seriously??? you want me to call you when I'm not busy?? I seem to have lost there number, hmmm, ....

WOW... touching... great stuff

And those are the ones that usually will tell you... "I'm not in any hurry... take your time..." LOL... man I know what ya mean.. been there,

You Want Fries With That? I often wonder if some people think car repair is like a fast food drive up restaurant. They must be thinking it is, because it's the only way to explain their actions and questions at the front desk. I've even had people pull in front of the shop or right in front of a bay door (blocking any progress I was making) and expect me to do whatever it is right then and there. Where in the history of auto repair did this ever get started? Some of these "hurry-up-get-it-done-now" people just don't get it. They seriously think there is a magical scanner that will not only diagnose, but also repair their car in 15 minutes or less. Now, I pride myself on diagnosing most problems within a given time period, usually 10 minutes or less, to no more than 45 minutes for some stubborn type problems. If it takes longer than 45 minutes just to diagnose it, I'm either doing it wrong, skipped a procedure, or I've finally met my match, and it's time to go flip hamburgers for a living. But if we are talking about the actual repair … that can take a lot of time. But as far as what it means to a service tech when somebody wants to wait while hovering over them like a vulture… well, it usually means (to me), they don't trust the technician. Maybe they just want to learn something… Really?… Learn what? How to fix their car so they don't have to bring it into the repair shop next time...? I guess that would speed things up a bit. But I'm not there to teach, I'm there to fix the car. I'd like to tell them they should go stand over the cooks and watch how they're making their next burger … yea; I can see that going over real well at the restaurant. There is also another type of person out there that not only has a great deal of miss-trust for service people, but their personal lives are so hectic they can't slow down to watch a sunset. They expect everything in their life to snap to attention when they say go, and nobody better slow them down. They'll wait in the lobby or waiting room for only so long, and then they'll start to pace around like a thoroughbred race horse anxious to get out of the starting blocks. First in the waiting room, then into the front of the office, finally their pacing reaches out into the parking lot, and up and down in front of the service bay doors… usually with their cell phone stuck to their head, trying to find another repair shop in the area that can "get-to-it" quicker than I can. By the time the pacing has reached the service bay level, the waiting is usually over, and they'll come up with some excuse like, "I just need to check on a few things across town. I'll be back in an hour or so" or "I forgot something at home, I'll be right back. Save me a spot OK?" Sure … you forgot something … Oh don't worry, I've saved a special spot just for you. Now really, do ya think I just fell of the proverbial turnip truck just yesterday? I guess you think you've come up with this grandiose idea of how to graciously back out of waiting all by yourself, and nobody has ever tried that line on me before. Right, you keep thinking that… … and of course, they never make it back… they're gone… gone for good. My wife will always tell me, "One car at a time, honey." I know, I know… it still bugs me that people can't be patient. I guess I'll never understand. Maybe what I should do is buy an old fast food restaurant with a drive up window, and set up a menu board with a selection of different types of auto repairs on it with prices clearly marked. Forget diagnosing cars, forget verifying complaints, and just fix whatever they order through that scratchy sounding intercom. I'd do all the money transactions at the first window, and then motion them onto the next window where a team of techs would jump out with little paper hats on and go at it with the speed of a pit crew. Wrenches flying, impacts at the ready, timing belts flying through the air and landing in the engine with every tooth precisely in place, and… before you know it… the car is back on the road. Wow, what an idea… Rush, rush, rush, rush… hurry, hurry, hurry… that's what it's really all about. I'm rushed enough anymore, I don't need any help from a cell phone carrying customer pacing in front of my service bays. It should be pretty simple to understand if all the bays are full and people are busy it's more than likely you're going to have to wait. You know, we all can't be first in line… quit shoving; you'll get your turn. What's really funny, well sort of funny… is the car in question isn't even in the service bay yet. We haven't even begun to see the fun we'll be having with Mr. or Mrs. Hurryup especially when you finally get it diagnosed and you tell them it's going to take a few hours to fix their car. I'd like to think I can help anyone who comes to my door, but you know, I've been at this a long time. I know better. Trying to please everyone is never going to be possible. I'm better off standing at the front desk and taking down their information and when they tell me… "I need this done right now!" I'm going to answer them with; "Do you want fries with that?" and see what kind of response I get then. View full article

Coming up with different topics for my column gets to be quite a job. The funny thing is, just when I think.. nah, this story will never work... I get a call from one of my editors and they LOVE it... go figure... this could be one of them... Ya never know do ya. I was working with another shop the other day with a component they thought was bad. They brought it over for me to check and it was exactly that... bad. But, these guys didn't have the same level of "respect" that I have with the parts stores. With my help they were credited back for the faulty part. (It jogged my memory of how I started out so I put this story together) Experience and a track record does help sometimes... LOL thanx Joe and the gang at ASO for providing me with a place to post my stories. Makes my job a lot easier. thanx again. I hope everyone enjoys reading them. Gonzo

Earning Respect at the Parts Store When your actions can affect their reaction I started my shop like a lot of other guys in the auto business. Not a lot of startup capital, a hand painted sign, a box of tools, and a dream. Boy, was that a long time ago. I still have the tools, but the hand painted sign is long gone. One thing I didn't have was any track record of paying my bills with the parts stores. People knew of me, but not well enough to put a lot of trust into my business just yet. Believe me, it was a struggle to get things started. I was buying parts from any local parts store or warehouse that would let me. A lot of the parts stores wouldn't even give me a line of credit, and others would only give me one week or so on credit. So every Monday I would have to make good on the parts I had bought the week before. I can't blame them; it's quite a risk for parts store to let their products go out the front door to an unknown without any track record. I wanted to do whatever it took to make my new business thrive. Back then I would do as much as I could in the way of in-house repairs, or rebuild as many components as possible. In fact, a lot of the components back then could be taken apart and rebuilt. (Not like the glued together components we see today.) I would rebuild switches, window motors, starters, alternators, or anything else that I could take apart and replace internal components on. It wasn't long after I opened that I ran into a little problem with one of my suppliers. It was on an IC-type Delco alternator that had a bad rectifier in it. Simple repair, I could knock this job out in no time. I ordered a new one from my supplier, and got to work tearing the alternator down to install the new rectifier. Once I had it back together again, I installed it back onto the car. As soon as I reached for the battery clamp and touched it to the battery, Z-ZAPP! Sparks flew in every direction. What the…!?!? What did I just do?? I disconnected everything I just put together. With the alternator disconnected the problem was gone. I must have screwed up…or at least that's what I was thinking at the time. Guess I'll take the whole thing apart and check my work. I went through the alternator with a fine toothed comb. Nothing looked wrong; everything was in its proper place. I got out the ohm meter and started checking things. Sure enough, the rectifier was the culprit. The diodes inside the rectifier that I just bought were installed from the factory … … … backwards! I called the supplier and told them the situation. I'm busy explaining to the parts store what I found out, but I could tell something else was wrong besides the rectifier. It was me, let's face it, I was young, a new shop owner (only in business a few months) with no track record, and nothing more than my word that the part was bad. The big problem was getting the part store convinced that I wasn't just another idiot with a box of wrenches trying to run a repair shop. I'm sure that's what they were thinking. I'll bet they've seen a lot of shops come and go … and there's no doubt I probably sounded like another "wanna-be" shop owner to them. I went into great detail how I discovered the backwards diodes, but what did you expect, I'm still that green kid with a multi-meter… they didn't believe a word of it. I had to buy a second one. Because it was an electrical part, and of course… I must have screwed it up, and as their store policy was "No return on electrical parts", I'll have to eat the first one, unless I can prove it was faulty. Their reasoning was simple, although buying extra parts wasn't in my budget at all. I have to agree with the parts store though, it doesn't take much to screw up an electrical part by an amateur installing it wrong, I might have been new at this shop ownership, but this wasn't the first time I installed a rectifier in a GM alternator. I knew what I was doing… I just had to gain their respect and confidence. When the replacement part showed up I checked it "before" installing it. Well, what do ya know, this one is backwards too. I called them back again, and now they were even more suspicious. Since I was the "new" guy on the block, I think they wanted to be sure about my results first. This time they sent another one down to me, and had me check it while the parts driver waited (I think they wanted to see if I was actually testing them)…..same thing again, it was backwards also. That's when I told them that I thought they had an entire order of these rectifiers built wrong, and to send me a different brand. There again, I'm the new guy, it's another case of "I have to buy another one." On their fourth trip to my shop the parts store brought one from a different manufacturer and this one checked out perfectly. In order to get my money back on the faulty ones, they had to send them back to their supplier and have it verified, before they could get their money back and of course my money back too. Unfortunately this took awhile. That was many, many, years ago. These days it's a little easier for me to return an electrical part if I need to. I very, very seldom ever do. My track record speaks for itself. Years later that same part store and I are old pals. The store has changed owners several times, but some of the same counter people are still there. Anytime they have a question on an electrical issue they'll usually call me first. I guess I've earned their trust, their respect, and their admiration. In fact, I've helped bail them out of a few situations too. I look at it this way, we have to provide some amount of trust in everything we do in life or business. Whether that trust is directed to a customer or a supplier, you still need to gain their confidence. Just because you think you know something… doesn't make you right… ya still have to prove it. Thanks for reading "Gonzo's Toolbox" these stories are here before anyone else sees them. Final editing and actual publication depends a lot on your comments. Not all my stories make it out there into print, but you can help decide which do. Leave a comment and let me know what you think of it. It really makes a difference. Thanks again to ASO Gonzo View full article

I feel like I should stand outside your shop on Friday at closing time with a bugle and playing taps... I think we have all had weeks like yours. Best regards and better weeks ahead. I'll play slowly... with feeling... and really really long... gonz

agreed... that's how I took the dad's answer to the deal

LET'S MAKE A DEAL You know everyone wants a deal, something cheaper, something "thrown in" to sweeten the pot. Money (as always) is always the driving force, and I don't think that will ever change. A deal is a deal, but if you can't make a deal… well, then, deal with it. One bright morning, a mid-90's Subaru showed up at the shop on the back of a wrecker. It's one of my regular customer's young teenager's car. The phone rang, it was the dad, Oh, and did he have a story to tell… a real whopper of a story. "My son told me he was driving along when the car bumped the curb and flattened two tires. I haven't seen the car, but my son said there wasn't any real damage. So, I don't think it should take you very long to get it back on the road. Do what you can, and call me with the estimate." I only saw the driver's side of the car when the tow truck pulled up. The tow driver came in and tells me, "Wherever you put this, you won't be able to move it again. You'll have to drag it or put it on "dollies", it's pretty messed up. If I were you, I'd stick it directly on the lift." Ok, ya got me, no real damage aye? But, the tow driver tells me differently… now I've got to go look for myself. No real damage? Hmmm, let's see…the whole passenger side of the car looks like someone tried to peel the sheet metal off with a can opener. Underneath the car was even worse. The upper and lower passenger side control arms are bent. The wheel, spindle, and tire are sitting on the oil pan area. The sway bar looks like a pretzel, both rims on the passenger side are beyond reuse, the tires are torn apart and shards of rubber are peeling off of the steel belts, and the transmission has been ripped off its mounts. Yea, you're right……he just bumped the curb……..yea sure he did. Looks more like he rode the edge of the curb like a bucking bronco for a long-long way. My guess is somebody was trying to drift around corners or slide it sideways with the emergency brake on, and probably took out every bus stop, park bench, and light pole for a block or two. Ok, the tow driver gets a "thumbs up" on this one; let's put it on the lift. I told the customer what I had found and the estimate for the repair, and as always I let him know about any "hidden" problems that might be lurking under all this stuff. He was not as shocked as I thought he would be even after I gave him the price for all the work that needed done, but definitely concerned. He kept hinting around as to what I thought might have caused the problem. From the conversation on the phone he was hoping I would say something like… mechanical failure, slick road conditions, defective part, or something like that. The farthest thing in his mind was that the kid might be the problem. I told him what I thought had happened, he didn't want to believe it, but he was going to check into to it. In the mean time, order the parts and start getting it ready to get back on the road. Several days later all the parts showed up, and I could get a better idea of the damage with parts that weren't bent like a pretzel. It wasn't long before I found a few more flaws in the little "Scooby-do", nothing major but the kind of thing that should be replaced. The extra parts were just a few brackets that were bent, but I knew dad's pocket book was getting tight. His main concern now was how much I was willing to chew off the original bill to help him out, and to my surprise he confirmed my suspicions as to what caused the accident. Oh yea, the kid was trying to drift the Subaru. (DAH! Now how do ya drift a front wheel drive car… ah, slide with the e-brake???) Now I can do a lot of things, and lower repair costs in order to save the customer money is one of them. Money, or not, I think there is a lesson to be learned here. I thought it was appropriate to make a small request to good old dad. If he wanted a cut on the price of the job, then let's make a deal. "You bring the little ridge runner to the shop dressed for work. He can earn his keep and save you a few bucks in the process. Maybe even take a different approach to driving in the future," I told the dad. My customer was a little taken back by my deal to save him some money, but it sounded like a good idea. Now his only job was to get the lad down to the shop ready to fulfill his part of the bargain. Work stopped until I heard back from him. In the mean time, the car is stuck on the lift with no wheels and only half a suspension. With a service bay tied up, it's starting to cost me money. 2 days go by, then 4 more, another week and still no answer. Finally on a Monday morning when I reached the point where I wasn't going to wait any longer… the dad calls, "Just fix it, and call me when it's ready. My son doesn't want to do it, and I'm not having much luck in getting him to your shop to help at all. So I guess I'll have to deal with the cost of the repair instead." A little different deal than I expected. Well, a deal is a deal. I'll handle my end of the bargain, and old dad has decided on how to handle his. There's an old saying that comes to mind, it goes like this; "If you want to save a dollar … do the job yourself, but if you have to pay someone else to do it… don't ask for cheap work, unless you're willing to share the cost in some way." After another day of getting everything back into place the car was ready for the road again. Sure there are few battle scars still showing, but mechanically the car is in great shape. That only leaves one more deal that's not quite finished. … … the father needs to deal with the son. . . . As always, these stories are here before final editing and publication. (You'll find the edited version in several trade magazines across the country.) Your feedback here at ASO helps me decide which stories go to the editors. So, in a way, YOU, actually decide which stories are sent to publication. I really appreciate your comments. Gonzo View full article