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I agree. Thanks for making me smile.

I get 3-5 views a week on Yelp. It has never caught on here.

Occasionally, I receive a Yelp request for a quote. I always respond to these although it is difficult since the customer rarely provides adequate information. I think only once did anyone come in the shop from these requests. Is this par for the course. Anyone refuse to respond or do it any differently.

If you are an antique I hate to think what that makes me, maybe a relic?

Last night- I dreamed I was a muffler: and woke up exhausted!

Gonzo, health issues have cause him to reevaluate his life and maybe it is time for us to do the same. Have you considered retirement? Where You Can Retire In the USA There is no perfect place to live in the USA. Sure, you probably have your idea of where "God’s country" is, but at best it only comes close to paradise; every place has drawbacks to offset its advantages. Hawaii, for example, has the kind of climate most of us would enjoy, but the cost of living there is terrible, because anything that can’t be made or grown locally has to be transported across the ocean. And every part of the nation has to deal with natural disasters at one time or another: blizzards, tornadoes, floods, etc. I heard once that when it comes to natural disasters, Utah is probably the safest state, because hurricanes, earthquakes and volcanoes never strike there -- but Utah still gets some fierce thunderstorms. Anyway, if you are looking for a place to retire, here is what you can expect from several retirement havens. You can retire to Seattle where: You can rust, grow moss on your back and webbed feet all at the same time. Coffee is a major food group. You can wear socks with your sandals and shorts with your parka. You can go to the Seattle Rain Festival--starts in January & ends in December. The four seasons are rainy, rainier, sunbreaks and rain, and construction. And, no matter how much you try, you can’t drive as fast as the Canadians. OR You can retire to Phoenix, Arizona where: You’re willing to park 3 blocks away because you found shade. You’ve experienced condensation on your hiney from the hot water in the toilet bowl. You can drive for 4 hours in one direction and never leave town. You have over 100 recipes for Mexican food. You know that "dry heat" is comparable to what hits you in the face when you open your oven door. The 4 seasons are: very warm but tolerable, hot, really hot, and ARE YOU FRICK’N KIDDING ME??!! OR You can retire to California where: You make $250,000/year and still can’t afford to buy a house. The fastest part of your commute is going down your driveway. You know how to eat an artichoke. You drive your rented Mercedes to your neighborhood block party. When someone asks you how far something is, you tell them how long it will take to get there rather than how many miles away it is. The 4 seasons are: Fire, Flood, Mud, and Drought. OR You can retire to New York City where: You say "the city" and expect everyone to know you mean Manhattan. You can get into a four-hour argument about how to get from Columbus Circle to Battery Park, but can’t find Wisconsin on a map. You think Central Park is "nature." You believe that being able to swear at people in their own language makes you multi-lingual. You’ve worn out a car horn (if you have a car). You think eye contact is an act of aggression. OR You can retire to Minnesota where: You only have four spices: salt, pepper, ketchup, and Tabasco. Halloween costumes fit over parkas. You have more than one recipe for casserole, which you call "hot pot." Sexy lingerie is anything made of flannel with less than eight buttons. The four seasons are: almost winter, winter, still winter, and construction. OR You can retire to the Deep South where: You can rent a movie and buy bait in the same store. "Y’all" is singular and "all y’all" is plural. "He needed killin'" is a valid defense. Everyone has 2 first names: Billy Bob, Jimmy Ray, Bonnie Sue, Betty Jean, etc. Everything is either "in yonder," "over yonder" or "out yonder." It’s important to know the difference, too. OR You can retire to Colorado where: You carry your $3,000 mountain bike atop your $500 car. You tell your husband to pick up Granola on his way home and he stops at the day care center. A pass does not involve a football or dating. The top of your head is bald, but you still have a ponytail. The seasons are: Hiking, Feels Like Snow, Snow, Melt/Snow/Melt. OR You can retire to the rural Midwest where: You’ve never met any celebrities, but the mayor knows your name. Your idea of a traffic jam is ten cars waiting to pass a tractor. You have had to switch from "heat" to "A/C" on the same day. You end sentences with a preposition, like, "Where’s my coat at?" When asked how your trip was to any exotic place, you say, "It was different!" You actually believe you don't have an accent when you speak. Your favorite church hymn is #372, "In Heaven There is No Beer." Badgers and Wolverines fight with each other for sport. Lutherans are the strongest gang and have the best colors. OR You can retire to Florida where: You eat dinner at 3:15 in the afternoon, to catch the early bird special. All purchases include a coupon of some kind -- even houses and cars. Everyone can recommend an excellent dermatologist. Road construction never ends anywhere in the state. Cars in front of you often appear to be driven by headless people. You’ve gotten used to having bugs in the kitchen, and lizards and snakes in the yard. The seasons are: Early Summer, High Summer, Late Summer, and Not Summer. OR You can retire to northern Michigan where: You don’t take your dog(s) to the vet when they return home with two hundred porcupine quills in their mouths, nose, gums, and tongue, because it happens too often to pay that much money, so you hold them down with scissors and pliers and do it yourself. Your trashcans/bags at the end of your driveway are in a protective structure in order to keep wildlife out, up to the size of a raccoon, because the bears will tear down any defense you build anyway. Locals fall into three categories: Yoopers (live north of the Mackinaw bridge), Trolls (live under/just south of the bridge), and Fudgies (downstaters on vacation). You know why downstaters are called Fudgies (their specialty is Mackinaw fudge). Snowfall is measured for the season in tens of feet. "Pasties" are what's for dinner, not something stuck on strippers. OR You can retire to Massachusetts . . . but I can’t think of one reason why you would. Ever.

Murphy applied for a forklift job at a famous Irish firm based in Dublin. A Norwegian applied for the same job and since both applicants had similar qualifications, they were asked to take a test and led to a quiet room with no interruptions by the Manager. When the results were in, both men had scored 19 out of 20. The manager went to Murphy and said, "Thank you for coming to the interview, but we've decided to give the Norwegian the job." Murphy,... "And why would you be doing that? We both got 19 questions correct. This being Ireland and me being Irish surely I should get the job." Manager, "We have made our decision not on the correct answers, but on the question you got wrong." Murphy, "And just how would one incorrect answer be better than another? Manager "That's simple; on question number 7 the Norwegian wrote down, 'I don't know.' You put down, 'Neither do I.' "

Russ and Sam, two friends, very old and frail, met in the park every day to feed the birds, watch the squirrels and discuss world problems. One day Russ didn't ....show up. Sam didn't think much about it and figured maybe he had a cold or something. But after Russ hadn't shown up for a week or so, Sam really got worried. However, since the only time they ever got together was at the park, Sam didn't know where Russ lived, so he was unable to find out what had happened to him. A month had passed, and Sam figured he had seen the last of Russ, but one day, Sam approached the park and -- lo and behold! -- there sat Russ! Sam was very excited and happy to see him and told him so. Then he said, "For crying out loud Russ, what in the world happened to you?" Russ replied, "I was in jail." "Jail?" cried Sam. "What in the world for?" "Well," Russ said, "you know Sue, that cute little blonde waitress at the coffee shop where I sometimes go?" "Yeah," said Sam, "I remember her. What about her?" "Well, one day she filed rape charges against me; and, at 89 years old, I was so proud that when I got into court, I pleaded 'guilty'." "The damn judge gave me 30 days for lying under oath."

It will be hard giving it up or parting it out. They become like our children, a part of us, and our identity of who we are.

Good ideas for service writers to be doing.

The problem is hanging on to the good ones. If a young person has a good work ethic in this day and age they can about write their own ticket.

All true Gonzo. What I hate is one star reviews with no comments and a name that is unrelated to any RO. I have about 4 of those on Goggle. Ofcourse, Gonzo the positive side is that if you no longer run a shop you don't have to worry about the reviews anymore. We will have to figure out how to leave you reviews as a writer though and presenter.

Simon, isn't that par for the course? You know what I mean don't you.

Despite some really hot weather AC work is not very strong in these parts.

Is there anyone in the US under the age of 25 who understand what having a job and working is all about. No body wants to work because it is hard, and dirty and takes away from their time to stand around and text message. I have hired 8 guys under the age of 25 in the last year trying to develop apprentices and I about the fire the last of the 8.

Jay, how about an update on how things are progressing for you?

If you can swing 2K per month and cover all the bills that it would seem you have almost no risk. If you have no capital this is a great opportunity. However, if the owner is in the building many customers may put pressure on him to work on their stuff. At least that would seem to be a possibility to me. If he gives you 15K in working capital are you also assuming the outstanding bills for the facility?

Congratulations. Hope it continues. Our June was strong but July has opened weak.

Andy I am in Indiana also but way down south on the other end of the state on the banks of the Ohio River almost into Kentucky.

Welcome Andy. Where are you located in Indiana.

Glad you are improving. This will probably work out well in the end. You have been wanting to hang up the wrench for some time now and this just pushes you to action. Hope that Gonzo Act II turns into a great performance.

In this area very few people seem to use Yelp. We probably get more stuff from Google and maybe Angies list. All I know is when I ask people who are first timers why they have came to our shop there is usually one of two things they tell me. First, they tell me it is a personal referral and second is our on line reviews. We don't have all five stars and we don't have dozens of reviews. We have some one star and negatives but we also have some genuine reviews that are better than anything I could make up. I think they come across as genuine and convey that we are really low pressure high help people. Here is an example: These guys are as good as it gets. Frank May took great car both of the car and of me, to the point of loaning me his own truck for a little while! Very patient, entirely honest, and more than willing to work with me to get what I needed at a reasonable price. No up-selling, no pressure to do more than what was necesssary. Plus, they're good mechanics and actually spotted the problem that a couple other mechanics (including a VW dealership) had overlooked. Highly recommended. If I didn't live 2000 miles away I'd take my car there all the time.

In some instances remans are not competitively priced compared to a local rebuild. In those few cases we have sublet some work.

When we started we had $50k-$75k in brakes, exhaust and shocks and struts. Today we have zero.

I ran an attractive ad on Career Builder for the last month and I only received one application and they were completely unqualified. I have searched resumes on Career Builder religiously for the last two months and have not found one candidate worth contacting. I have also searched the state sponsored job site Indiana Career Connect with similar results. It is very, very difficult. A guy must always be looking and willing to grab a likely candidate if they come along. I have five techs and four of the five have worked with me before and I took them back.