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New Thoughts of the day... Now that I'm older and slowing down a bit.

 

I changed my car horn to gunshot sounds. People get out of the way much faster now.

 

Gone are the days when girls used to cook like their mothers. Now they drink like their fathers.

 

You know that tingly little feeling you get when you really like someone? That's common sense leaving your body.

 

I didn't make it to the gym today. That makes five years in a row.

 

I decided to change calling the bathroom the John and renamed it the Jim. I feel so much better saying I went to the Jim this morning.

 

Last year I joined a support group for procrastinators. We haven't met yet.

 

Old age is coming at a really bad time.

 

When I was a child I thought “Nap Time” was a punishment. Now, as a grownup, it feels like a small vacation.

 

The biggest lie I tell myself is, "I don't need to write that down, I'll remember it."

 

I don't have gray hair; I have "wisdom highlights." I'm just very wise.

 

Teach your daughter how to shoot, because a restraining order is just a piece of paper.

 

If God wanted me to touch my toes, he would've put them on my knees.

 

Why do I have to press one for English when you're just going to transfer me to someone I can't understand anyway?

 

Of course I talk to myself; sometimes I need expert advice.

 

At my age "Getting lucky" means walking into a room and remembering what I came in there for.

 

  • 2 months later...


Posted

These are some good jokes and I enjoy them. A while back, I came across this video and thought it was funny.

There's a hot rich matrix for the women by the same man. It's kinda funny too.

 

 

  • 1 month later...
  • 1 month later...
  • 4 weeks later...
Posted

From one of my favorite comics...Rodney Dangerfield

 

“My wife and I hav agreed to smoke only after sex. I have the same pack of cigarettes since 1975. What bothers me is my wife is up to 3 packs a day.”

  • 3 months later...

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  • Have you checked out Joe's Latest Blog?

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      It always amazes me when I hear about a technician who quits one repair shop to go work at another shop for less money. I know you have heard of this too, and you’ve probably asked yourself, “Can this be true? And Why?” The answer rests within the culture of the company. More specifically, the boss, manager, or a toxic work environment literally pushed the technician out the door.
      While money and benefits tend to attract people to a company, it won’t keep them there. When a technician begins to look over the fence for greener grass, that is usually a sign that something is wrong within the workplace. It also means that his or her heart is probably already gone. If the issue is not resolved, no amount of money will keep that technician for the long term. The heart is always the first to leave. The last thing that leaves is the technician’s toolbox.
      Shop owners: Focus more on employee retention than acquisition. This is not to say that you should not be constantly recruiting. You should. What it does means is that once you hire someone, your job isn’t over, that’s when it begins. Get to know your technicians. Build strong relationships. Have frequent one-on-ones. Engage in meaningful conversation. Find what truly motivates your technicians. You may be surprised that while money is a motivator, it’s usually not the prime motivator.
      One last thing; the cost of technician turnover can be financially devastating. It also affects shop morale. Do all you can to create a workplace where technicians feel they are respected, recognized, and know that their work contributes to the overall success of the company. This will lead to improved morale and team spirit. Remember, when you see a technician’s toolbox rolling out of the bay on its way to another shop, the heart was most likely gone long before that.
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